fashion feature: LuLaRoe

Social media is so great and I was pleasantly surprised to receive an email from the lovely girls at LuLaRoe: Crystal Vaughn VIP  asking if I would feature their clothing on my bloggy blog.  It's been a long time since I've had a good reason to talk fashion, but let me tell you what, LuLaRoe is a FABULOUS reason!  And to top it all off, I get to offer you the sweetest giveaway for $40 in Lula cash so you can buy your own!  It's a Win/Win! Keep on reading and find out why I am the newest super fan of LuLaRoe.

For those of you who have been faithful readers from the beginning (bless you), you know that I love fashion, but I don't do trendy.  I love different, bold and comfortable.  Sometimes those three requirements are hard to accomplish in one piece of clothing.  However, I was able to achieve that with the maxi skirt and sassy leggings that Emily sent me.  First we will talk about this skirt and two of my favorite words: polka dots.

The maxi skirt is a great quality cotton.  It's also bright and turns heads.  I loved it from the moment I tried it on.  The skirt can also double as a tube dress, but I kept it in traditional form for this photo shoot and review.  Versatility and durability are a big deal for me and I can already tell that this cotton will stand the test of time....or in my case.....lots of days wearing it for more occasions than a couple of hours in church.  I live in maxi skirts during all seasons so I want it to last forever; especially if it's really cute!

Another really important element for me in a piece of clothing is its ability to be multi-seasonal.  This skirt definitely fits the bill with its deep navy and mustard polka dots.  A true crossover skirt that looked totally amazing with the fall foliage of East Idaho as its backdrop, but I know I will be able to rock it next spring and summer.

Final thoughts on the maxi skirt?  Two thumbs up and a bit of silly kissy face!  Sign up on their Facebook page to get your own maxi skirt in a pattern that fits your style as well as this did mine.

35% off all orders with code COOKBOOK35 at Blurb

Next were these magnificent, hot pink leggings!  I am in love with them! I live for different and I also love pattern & pattern so we went full throttle with this outfit!  The top is a thrift store find and the shoes are Clarks wedges that I bought on clearance last month while on a weekend getaway in Driggs, Idaho.

When I agreed to feature LuLaRoe, I was very skeptical about the leggings.  I'm curvy and even curvier than I was last year and I generally opt for no leggings while out shopping because it's just depressing to try them on.  Who needs the reminder that there are a few extra curves and padding in all the wrong places?  Well, these leggings surprised me!  As soon as I put them on, I was in heaven.  My neighbor has a collection of LuLaRoe leggings and she swears by them for their comfort, quality of cotton (again) and their killer prints!  I too have fallen in love with these leggings and I have 3 more pair ordered and headed my way in the mail!  No sale is ever the same so you never know what is going to be available for purchase.  Depending on how adventurous you are, that can be a pro and a con.  I was grateful to find these pink beauties because they are SO much my style and personality.  I mean.....how can I not pose for a picture like this when wearing print and print?

I was so pleased with these leggings and can't wait to pair them with other fun tunics in my closet.  They are the kind of leggings that force people to stop and say, "where did you get those fabulous leggings?" I will gladly say that I got them from LulaRoe Crystal Vaughn VIP

What I love the most about LuLaRoe besides the obvious quality, is the selection of prints that scream "just be you and rock that look!" That is totally my jam and I will gladly keep these in my closet for years to come! And now that I've talked your face off with all the benefits of LuLaRoe, I think you better sign up for $40 in free LuLa cash from Emily and her team!  If you're anything like me you'll want it all!  

The moral of the story: sassy fashion is for all shapes and sizes and with a little effort, you too can find a clothing line that shows your true personality!  

Until next time, my lovelies!

-R

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The Road Less Traveled.

In the poem “The Road Not Taken” Robert Frost penned the following, “two roads diverged in a yellow wood, and sorry I could not travel both and be one traveler, long I stood and looked down one as far as I could to where it bent in the undergrowth; then took the other, as just as fair, and having the better claim because it was grassy and wanted wear; though as for that the passing there had worn them really about the same.”

This poem has always spoke to me and this year I have felt some aftermath of taking the road that seemed fairer because the grass was greener and appeared to have less wear.  This year has been intense and emotional behind the scenes. Don’t get me wrong; I have been immensely blessed, but the challenges have kept their front row seats for a good chunk of this year.

Two months after my granddad passed away, I was thrown in to the darkness of unemployment and it was a really sad and challenging reality to face.  I loved my job and my boss was one of my best ever, but the timing was off for a number of reasons and it was decided that I needed to embark on a new adventure.  Sword to my heart, but what do you do?  When I took this particular job, I left an 11 year career in an industry that nearly sucked the life and love out of me.  I thrived in it, made great money, had awesome contacts and friends, but the stress was so astronomical that I made the choice for my family of one to join an industry that was much more my forte and made me happy.  What transpired in my next job was a true experience of growth, acceptance that it was for a short time in my life path, but it also had a list of blessings that were added to my life. I was given a task that was challenging and tedious, but equally rewarding.  I felt like I was doing the right thing by taking this road. I took a risk in my career and chose the road less traveled after having been on the grassy, fair path. It was hard, but it was happy and successful as well. 

In the midst of all my adventures, I decided that when I finally came out of the forest of unemployment sadness and stress, I would reward myself with a grand costume adventure this Halloween.  In my last post I talked about geekery and its beauty and this is where mine comes in to play.  I LOVE HALLOWEEN. When I was a kid, my siblings and I looked forward to Halloween and always had fabulous costumes.  This has carried over in to my adult life and Utah is the mecca of Halloween celebration so this feeds my love.  Last year I purchased a pattern with the hopes of being Red Riding Hood.  Life happened and I ended up putting it on the back burner for 2015.  Then I lost my job, was poor indefinitely and didn’t know if I was going to work for someone who even celebrated the holiday.  Fast forward to September when I was presented with an offer with a company that not only celebrates Halloween, but STOPS all business to party for an entire day. I am in heaven.

I was lucky enough to have an awesome artistic posse this year to create my dream costume also known as #RayRidingHood2015.  My costume was custom designed (a joint collaboration) by me and Crystal from Anubis Creations in Salt Lake.  I did NOT want a cape.  I wanted it as a lace-up bodice and all one piece and the “Lord of The Rings” massive hood in red velveteen.  That is exactly what I got.

I also wanted to have a petticoat and was lucky enough to find a black number that is made in the USA from Endless Indulgence on Historical 25th Street in Ogden.  In case it wasn’t cool enough already, I decided that I needed bad ass red shoes and I picked those up at Endless Indulgence as well.

Last, but certainly not least, was the mask.  I STRESS about never having a male counterpart for Halloween.  It’s so insanely dumb, but it’s a total girl moment that I have almost every single damn year.  I briefly voiced this concern to my friend Amanda from Artisan Maskers and she said, “um I will make you a gorgeous, one-of-a-kind wolf mask and you will be both.”  Sold. Feminist independence for the win!  She is so talented and I am honored to wear such a beautiful piece of artwork on my face.

As Kelsey and I were shooting the photos at Union Station in Ogden I got very introspective and borderline emotional when we looked in to the sunset and dual train tracks and the choice of paths before us.  This has been my life this year!  It has been a constant battle of choices, mistakes and heartache, but then getting back on track and finding happiness and my zen again.

The last paragraph of Robert Frost’s poem is powerful and inspires me.  It says, “I shall be telling this with a sigh, somewhere ages and ages hence; two roads diverged in a wood, and I, I took the one less traveled by and that has made all the difference.” 

It truly made all the difference in my life to take the road less traveled last July when I made the choice to leave a toxic situation and move towards my ultimate happiness in a new career.  Even though there was still sadness and struggle, the end result is the RIGHT result for me and that is the difference that matters.  We can do hard things, my lovelies.  We can achieve goals and trudge through trial even when we think it is UTTERLY IMPOSSIBLE.

The moral of the story:  Fear not to take the road less traveled.  It is the road that leads to personal growth and a whirlwind of adventure.

Until next time, my lovelies!

-R

Turn Your Eye To The Sky.

Hello, my lovelies!  I bet you didn't expect more photos from my summer shoot with Kel-Z Photography to come up.  Bazinga!  I tricked ya!  I have two more that I'll be bringing to you, but I'll keep you guessing.  This photo is one of my favorites.  Ogden is ma 'hood and 25th Street is our playground.  I really wanted an umbrella shot and Kelsey had this totally amazing vintage umbrella that we were able to use.  Flowers, sunshine, blue sky, mountain view, cute shoes and pink?  I will take it!  Before we headed to the rainbow door (my FAVORITE photos) we snapped this photo at Ogden's Union Station.  

I've been on a social media siesta for the last month.  Life has kicked my trash a bit and I needed some self care, brain vacay and stepping away from social media seemed to be my answer.  During the last month, I've experienced some trigger moments, too many tears to admit, but a myriad of blessings that I may have missed if I was consumed with technology.  I've also witnessed some friends and family deeply struggling with the storms of depression themselves and it has reminded me that we can't ever ever ever forget to take care of ourselves and stay on track with what our body is telling us.  I have felt the need to share some thoughts with you about keeping an attitude of faith during the shit storm of life, but also being acutely aware of the signs that your body sends to you as a cry for self care.  

During the times of my life that I've been in deep, dark, incomprehensible depression, I've always wondered how I would get out of it.  My first extreme episode was when I was 19 and I would lay awake at night and pray to God that I would fall asleep so that when I woke up it would be gone.  Those are intensely haunting memories that I won't ever let myself forget completely.  The biggest lesson I learned from that first round of depression was the beginning of a decade of recognizing triggers.  It wasn't until I went to organized therapy that I admitted out loud that I had triggers and that I needed to be aware of them, accept them and be ready to work through them when something brought them up in my memory. Not easy. 

Triggers are those events, people, smells, shoes, sayings, tv shows, colors, foods that remind you of a time when you were in danger or volatile and send you in to a tale spin of epic proportions.  Triggers SUCK.  Most of the time you don't see them coming and when they smack you in the face you think, "DAMN IT, why did I let myself get here?"  But, the fact is, once it happens, you have to ride with the waves and go in to self care mode while your brain works through it.  I can't and won't tell you that I have all the answers about dealing with triggers.  We all have different methods of coping, but I can tell you that if you will turn your eye to the sky, remember that there is a big beautiful world full of people who love you, anything is possible and you will make it.  

Along with triggers, I want to talk with you about a little thing called Vitamin D.  As a redhead with fair skin who grew up in the insanely cold tundra of Southeastern Montana in an artsy poor family, I didn't know what outdoor recreation really was as a child and youth.  The concept of enjoying winter was foreign and it also meant that I didn't see a lot of Vit D time from October to April.  We HATE winter in my family.  It's depressing, cold as hell and dark at 4 pm.  When I moved to Salt Lake and experienced my first winter with the inversion, I thought I was going to die.  I was miserable.  I could hardly cope.  I was sick, it was dark and I craved clean air and sunshine something fierce.  It wasn't until my fifth Utah winter (what?) that I went to a lady doctor and asked to have my Vitamin D levels tested.  Do you want to guess the outcome????  I barely registered on the charts.  She looked at me and asked, "how do you even cope during the winter?"  Um, good question, lady!  In my previous 10 years of treatment and medical care I had NEVER had a lady doctor say, "let's test your Vitamin D and see if that is contributing to your depression during certain times of the month."  I sat in the exam room and cried.  I finally had answers.  Answers meant I could make a plan and help myself feel better.  

When I moved to Ogden, I thought, OK, self, we need to get a grip on winter.  My first winter here wasn't a walk in the park, but when I bought my current car, I knew that it was absolutely necessary to spend more money on an SUV so that I had the ability to solve my winter blues symptoms by driving to the grocery store myself after a blizzard for a week-supply of Diet Coke (totally have many times) or drive to Ogden Valley and find sunshine and clean air on a Sunday afternoon.  I am going in to my fourth winter in Ogden (holy moly, time flies) and I'm already making a plan of how I will make it FUN!  That is a real-life example of knowing my triggers and staying ahead of them as much as I can by having a plan.  

Vitamin D is critical to our mental health, my lovelies.  However, it can't always be consumed in food or sucked up by being outside in the sunshine.  Talk to your health professional and ask the questions.  Pay for the test to get an idea of where you stand with your Vitamin D levels.  Women generally are always low.  Just like me, when you have answers, you can make a plan and start self care and watch for your triggers.  Knowledge is power.  It truly is.  

The moral of the story: we live in a beautiful imperfect world full of people who love us and can help us when we don't know what to do next.  Eye to the sky, ask the questions and make a plan.  You can do it.  I know it.  

Until next time, my lovelies.  

-R

This Way to Adventure.

The late Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. said, "Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase."  I have to admit that I've been at a loss for the right words for this post.  I've known the title for probably two months, but no words.  Life has a way of testing my patience and it's safe to say that I'm in that moment right now with my current adventure.  But!  I can also say that the blessings are PLENTIFUL.  I am so grateful for the rays of sunshine that surround me and offer random pep talk text messages, inspirational quotes on my Facebook page, dinners, amusement park adventures (more on that later) and the list goes on and on.  

Throughout my career I've always had a mantra of "anything is possible with a good pair of red shoes."  My friend's father once told me that he didn't like red shoes because that's what the hookers in Puerto Rico wore when he was a kid.  Nonetheless, I've always felt great power in a good pair of red shoes.  How many times do we have a day that we think, "huh, how about I stay in my bed, firmly planted under the covers, and the grown-upping ceases?"  I've had them a few too many days in my life, but some of the BEST days I've experienced have been those when I kicked myself out of bed, got dressed, threw on my red shoes and showed up.  It's not easy.  I've talked about my bestie relationship with a thing called depression and one thing that is a consistent is this: the days you want to stay in bed and give the hell up are the days you need to get out of bed the MOST and move and be active.  It is seriously the biggest, most painful paradox, but it's true.  Get that blood flowing and force your brain to think about things other than the suckiness of your life and find the sunshine.  

Faith in the unknown is an on-going battle for me.  I'm a planner, a doer, a giver and a lady who likes to have a clear idea of where I'm headed next.  A wise friend gave me the advice that I need to "breathe and trust" and let life happen.  Phew!  Wait, what?  You want me to settle down and trust?  Whoa, whoa the faith train has pulled into town and I have been issued a first-class ticket.  It's so simple and I'm here to say, it works.  As I calm down, I tend to think more clearly and see those small and simple blessings that are right in front of my face. . . and then there was the day I let my bestie talk me into something completely c-razy, but it proved a fierce point that I needed re-enforced: I can do scary things.  

See this photo?  To some it may look like a 'gorgeous Utah sunset' but to me it is pure and utter craziness because I was standing in line to get on this nutso roller coaster at Lagoon.  Behold, the white roller coaster of death.  The rickety, scary-as-hell, oldest, made-of-wood roller coaster.  My Lu bestie came to visit this last weekend and she had passes to Lagoon for her company summer party that she shared for my birthday adventure present.  I'm a lost cause at amusement parks.  I have a weak stomach, issues with heights and the attention span of a 5 year-old while waiting in line.  However, I also know that I don't die when I'm under the influence of Dramamine and if I calm down and close my eyes (total child) I do actually have fun.  So, little by little she got me to go on crazy-ish rides.  When she suggested the white roller coaster I thought, "why the hell not?  I won't die.  I might come close, but I won't die."  So crazy that I did it and I am pretty sure I was more entertaining for her as I tried to not wet myself or cry or both.  But!  I DID IT!  I so totally did it and I walked away feeling like a champ because I overcame a serious amount of fear.  As I was walking like a drunken sailor to the concession stand for my free Diet Coke (WINNING!) I said to her, "you do realize this is going in my next blog post?"  So there you go.  Laugh amongst yourselves that I even told you about it. 

So, back to the real photos....I had so much fun shooting this outfit with Kelsey.  It had a vintage, sassy flair...which shouldn't surprise any of you.  The cardigan is from college (a LONG time ago) and I refuse to get rid of it.  The dress was a great D.I. find, the necklace is from Chic Style Utah and the shoes were on sale at PayLess.

What I love about life is that sometimes the best coping mechanism is wearing a good pair of red shoes and throwing on those sunnies to have a moment to breathe while no one is looking in your eyes to see the real story.  We can't wear our sunnies all the time, but we can sure take a break and look hot whilst letting ourselves breathe and trust.

So, here I am in the middle of the road.  Which adventure next?  Which staircase should I take?  At this very second I don't know the answer, but I know that life keeps moving forward and the blessings keep falling out of the sky and I continue to keep a straight path in sight and a smile on my face.

The moral of the story:  Life will always have a new adventure for us to tackle, but the good news is: we CAN do scary things and we DO live to tell about it!

Until next time, my lovelies!
-R

In My Life.

This new set of photos with the lovely Kel-Z Photography has really blown me out of the water.  It's by far the series that I am the most comfortable with and feel like I look like myself.  This particular outfit is no exception.  In fact, this outfit has a long list of stories.  The skirt basically cut off all breathing ability and we giggled a LOT as I tried to drive us around Ogden cut off lung capacity.  The belt is turned backwards because I think it looks dumb the "normal" way with this tunic from Chic Style Utah.   Last, but not least, the shoes are bad-ass-smokin hot, but were purchased in an extremely challenging period of my life.  And thus, we engage in some real talk avec Ray for this week's blog post.  

A couple of months ago I decided to deep clean the closet and donate a LOT of shoes to a non-profit that my friends run.  As I was going through my shoes I came upon these beauties.  At first glance my heart jumps a little because they are HOT.  Vintage-inspired, polka dots, peep toe, good heel.  But, in the same string of happy emotions, my heart also sinks just a tiny bit as I have a flashback with a flood of memories that are attached to these shoes.  In that moment, as I sat on my closet floor, I opted to keep them because I needed the reminder of how far I've come since they were purchased lots of years ago.  

One of my favorite Beatles hits is "In My Life."  The lyrics speak to me and it is one of those songs that I will randomly remember while I'm going about my day and sing out loud.  The lyrics I particularly love are, "There are places I remember all my life.  Though some have changed, some forever, not for better; some have gone and some remain.  All these places have their moments of lovers and friends I still can recall.  Some are dead and some are living; in my life I loved them all."  Things have changed for me; friends and loves have come and gone, but I do remember them all.  When I think about the events that surround these shoes I get teary.  Not because I'm sad that it didn't work the way I thought it was supposed to; that was impossible.  I get teary because I was STRONG in my time of weakness and I worked through it and I am a BETTER human because of it because I let God's timing take over.  

This past week I felt compelled to share my "closing remarks" from my last session of therapy with a dear friend.  It's been at least 2 years since I've read them from start to finish.  They are the kind of words that I am a-OK with staying in the past, but I haven't forgot what I wrote.  My therapist encouraged closing remarks with a series of questions that were the highlights of the goals I set to accomplish in my journey with her.  For me, it was a critical part of my healing because it forced me to really think about what we had accomplished, but what I also had in front of me as I went about my life without the security blanket of a third party helping me cope.  I've decided to share a portion of them with you today because I think this is a sentiment that many of us can relate to at some point in our life.  I can also attest to the absolute feeling of despair and mourning that I felt as I went through the process of therapy.  As you shed the shit your brain actually has to go through a process of reprogramming to adjust to life being different (even though it is better).  

"In many great movies when the film concludes the sorrowful words, "The End" stream on the screen and the viewer is done.  Done knowing what happens next and perhaps hoping for more.  However, with most stories "The End" really just means an end to THAT moment, not an end all together.  

So, here I sit celebrating that I am at the END of my time in therapy.  

It's not easy to admit you're jacked up to a complete stranger.  It actually sucks really bad and hurts like hell,  But, slowly as each layer of hate was peeled back and thrown away I got better.  For every bad thing I went through it seemed that little good things snuck their way in.  

The question has been posed to me when do you go back to loving deeply and what is the plan?  Well I don't know what the plan is.  The last 2 years were hell on earth and I had to purge some of those I loved the most out of my life because their love was toxic.  And I am here to tell you that any way you toss it up, toxic is still toxic.  

So, with a tear in my eye and a cute new outfit to boot....I say, cheers to the end because it only means a new beginning."

As soon as I copied those words in to the email for my friend I had to take a long, deep breath.  A moment to let it sink in that I HAVE improved.  I HAVE grown.  I HAVE overcome so much.  And thank God.  I thank Him every single day for The End meaning The Beginning for me.  

Not all therapists are created equal (they are still human) and I've had friends express sentiments of frustration that their attempt at therapy wasn't as successful as mine.  On the same hand, I've also had friends who have shared my sentiments that therapy was absolutely the BEST choice they've ever made because it saved their life and gave them the coping skills that they were missing and helped them move on.  If you are reading this and thinking, "I'm one of those people who HATED therapy."  Please don't give up.  Shop around.  This is your life we are talking about!  Embrace that you are in control of your happiness and healing and find your "Jenn."  She or He is out there; I promise.  

The Beatles' "In My Life" continues by saying, "And I know I'll never lose affection for people and things that went before.  I know I'll often stop and think about them.  In my life I loved you more.  In my life I loved you more." 

For me, the words "in my life I loved you more" are talking about me.  I HAD to love myself more and because I did, I took that leap and created a new beginning out of what seemed to be the end.  Dig deep, find that love for yourself, be brave, and have the courage to embrace the end being your new beginning.

The moral of the story:  The storms of life are REAL and will suck all the color out of life, but if we will have courage, faith and perseverance, the colors and sunshine WILL return.  In your life and in my life, love them more as we recall that they are the beginning, not the end.  

Until next time, my lovelies!

-R

Friends ARE the Spoon Full of Sugar.

Guess what, my lovelies!?  It's time for the next round of fabulous photo shoot features and blog posts with Kel-Z Photography.  I am beyond pleased with the results from this shoot and I can't wait to share my thoughts with you as well as her incredible art.

It's always a huge delimmma as to which outfit I will feature first because I love them all.  Generally, it comes down to the theme that I am going to talk about that makes the decision easy.  Such is this case this week.  First of all, can we all just stop and sigh in unison over the door in the photo above?  I have noticed that there are some pretty rad doors on the buildings in Ogden so I wanted to center some of my photos around those.  Random?  Yep!  Surprised?  You shouldn't be.  This group of photos were shot in front of the USDA Building on the corner of Adams Avenue and 25th Street here in Ogden.  Really cool building.  I was so giddy when I discovered it and that door.  Aw, the door.  The top I am wearing is from Chic Style Utah in South Ogden, UT.  It's a longtime favorite because of its simplicity and elegance.  Be sure to check them out by going HERE!

For the majority of my professional life in the service industry, I've played the game of association to remember people, places, things, events, lots of things.  I especially do this with clothes.  I remember people by the outfit and/or shoes they were wearing when I first met them or first saw them (that secret crush....aw yes.....that day....he looked so handsomer).  But, on the same hand, I also remember things with the clothing I have.  My entire closet is full of memories (LOTS of them...let's not get into that subject)  This outfit is substantially significant because it represents two of my dearest, longest friends who have done SO much for me in such small and simple ways.  And so I submit, in true Mary Poppins form, friends ARE the spoon full of sugar that makes the bitter medicine of life go down.

A couple of years ago I served on a committee for a Great Gatsby-themed charity gala in Utah County.  It was one of the greatest experiences of my life for a long list of reasons.  In the midst of all the planning for my part with the decorations, I was desperately trying to find the PERFECT outfit.  I went back and forth on the outfit options and what style I wanted.  I had told my friend Colleen that I was stressing over the outfit (normal in Ray Land) and one day I get a text from her that says "what size shoes do you wear?"  I told her and she replied, "I just found the most perfect Gatsby shoes and I am buying them and sending them in the mail tomorrow....be on the look-out.  You have to have them."  At this point, I hadn't decided which route I was going to take with the outfit, but was SO touched that she was on the look-out for the perfect shoes in Montana.  I had no idea what they looked like, but I trusted her judgement and when the box landed on my doorstep and I opened it,  I cried.  Basically, the perfect shoes, perfect fit and totally my style for everyday wear, not just for the event.  It may sound silly, but I treasure these shoes because of the thoughtfulness and genuine care of my friend that they represent.  I can absolutely attest to how hectic my friend's life is running a business, managing a household of hooligan boys and a diva dog, but she STILL makes time for her friends and these shoes are my constant proof.  How often do we take time to think outside of the box and do something for our friends that they would never ever do for themselves OR have the means to do?  

And then there was the skirt.  If you've been a die-hard fan of the blog, you may recognize it from a very early fashion feature that talked about my love for thrifting for things that I can transform from ugly to masterpiece.  When I wear this skirt I think of my Jo.  This skirt was the result of an SOS trip to Idaho to meet each other in the middle for comfort food, girl talk and thrifting....let me elaborate.  Jo and I have been BEST friends for 12 years.  We have gone to hell and back with each other.  We talk almost daily and are sisters from other misters.  Her family is my family.  We became friends while I lived in Montana and one of the other quirks I have is my passionate (ok maybe a little too dramatic...maybe not) love affair with Taco Johns.  It's cheap tex-mex and I HEART it.  They don't have these restaurants in Utah and it is my comfort food.  So silly, but the absolute truth and presents a problem when I am having a BAD day and just want to feel some normalcy again.  There is a Taco Johns in Pocatello, Idaho which is bascially half way for Jo and I so one Saturday I sent her the SOS text and said, "do you have plans today, I am getting in my car and driving to Taco Johns in Pokey, can you meet me?"  At this point in my life, that was a very out-of-character move and she dropped everything and got in her car and came to my rescue.  Do you have those friends that the minute you see them and hug them that you feel like you're not going to implode and can continue to conquer the world?  Jo is on that list.  She's simply amazing.  That day included a lot of shared feelings from both of us over potato oles and Diet Dew and then we found the local thrift store and laughed and laughed over how horribly ugly this dress was and how I would make it pretty and convert it to a skirt.  You don't believe me?  Look at the original blog post HERE.  It was crazy ugly and I wasn't wearing a lick of makeup when we did the duck face photo in the store.  We've since made one other SOS trip to Pocatello and it was full of laughing, eating and thrifting....our favorite.  I thank God daily for the blessing of this bestie of mine.  She does so many small, simple acts of kindness for everyone around her, including me.  But, I have to say that I adore the fact that she is my voice of reason and consistency that keeps me moving forward in the thick of the storm.

This wouldn't be a true post about simple acts of kindness without giving accolades to Suzy from Just Be Purses.  She has a really great Utah-based business called Just Be Purses.  I love her ability to make seemingly "weird fabric" into GORGEOUS one-of-a-kind masterpieces.  I featured her bags in my winter photo shoot and this time around I wanted to feature her clutch.  Isn't it gorgeous????!!  I was glad I found this one and even more grateful for her generosity in donating it for the photo shoot as well as a clutch that we are giving away (as shown below).  Genuinely kind people make life bearable.  Please show her some love by checking out her Facebook page HERE and go visit her booth at Logan's Summerfest next weekend!!  

The moral of the story: thank GOODNESS for friends who are the spoon full of sugar as we swallow the bitter medicine that is life at times.  They bring us sunshine, potato oles, and the perfect shoes...among a long long list of other things.  Thank yours today.  Do it.  NOW.  

Until next time, my lovelies!

-R

  

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Embrace It.

Well, this week was a LOT of facing reality and dealing with it.  Amidst the MANY hours on the road driving solo, the hours laying awake past 2 am and the hours of funeralling and reminiscing about my dearest Granddad this weekend, I learned a lot about myself.  Whoa.  I mean, holy run-on sentence, but it is true.  I find it NO coincidence that the last fashion feature this month is centered around my absolute favorite outfit from the winter photo shoot and my favorite words: embrace imperfection.  

When I planned the outfits for this shoot with Kel-Z Photography, I wanted it to be a whole hella bunch of color.  I also wanted to show my random fashion sense.  It's a pretty regular occurance that I have people stop me and say, "I love your outfit...only you could get away with that combo."  Um, thanks?  But, then I thank them and say, well, it just kind of happens.  To be quite honest....sometimes...ok ALL the damn time....it is on the third or fourth outfit combo and my bed is piled high with vetoed outfits and I'm running late so I just go with it and chalk it up to my "quirky fashion sense."  There's a tip of the crazy for you.  

Before we get to deep thought avec Ray I will give you the outfit details....Here you go!

• Scarf: Utah State bookstore (random, don't ask questions)
• Gray top: Chic Style Utah
• Mint Green pants which are actually capris (gasp!): Macy*s
• Super rad carpet bag: Just Be Purses
• Bracelet: local vender at the Ogden Harvest Moon Festival (aka that one night I discovered those cute beardy boys in VanLadyLove)

When we speak of imperfection, how many of us shudder and start to list the LONG list (in our minds) of our shortcomings?  Ooh Ooh, pick me, pick me...the emotional, overanalyzing, blunt girl in the back row with a Diet Coke in her hand, please.  We ALL do it and we should ALL STOP it.  But, I know as well as the next person, that it is a task that is easier said than done.  We are constantly bombarded in the media to be skinnier, richer, nicer, bitchier (you know it's true), greener and the list goes on and on.  How many times do we just stop and think, "I am frickin awesome and hella broken, but it is OK." 

I got a good solid dose of that this week as I embarked on my least favorite mental land, other than full-on depression, and that is mourning world.  It sucks.  Like f-bomb sucks.  It is a mental state that offers very little control and basically you just let it ride its course, hold on and have a boat load of patience with yourself.  The whole week my grandma kept saying, "we all mourn differently, it's ok."  That is an understatement.  I found that my list of imperfections rose to the top of the list on a sea of my never-ending tears.  I was more unfiltered that usual and I knew it and I only used it to my advantage with one person and he was LONG overdue for the unleashing that occurred.  I figured if I was going to be crying already then why the hell not add something else to the list. 

In all seriousness, our imperfections are what test us the most.  I could wax eloquent in the religious department, but I will just say this....we are only given as much trial as God knows we can handle.  Period!  But, the kicker is we don't get to PICK when it's officially too hard...He does.  Talk about wishing we could veto THAT rule.  But, it's true.  I've had a couple of experiences in my life (depression not being one of them ... exception to this comment) when I was at my utter wits end and I had a pretty pointed and relatively angry prayer with God and within a few days there was some resolution.  But that is RARE.  Don't expect God to have a magic wand and wave it.  Allow for His timing and go with the flow.  And now I will go get my handheld mirror and say that out loud to myself three times. 

I think the greatest blessing in admitting our imperfections is being able to see how every single human being in our life is supposed to be there to fill in the gaps.  Our gaps of imperfection are mended and filled by our friends, family, lovers, children, grandparents, etc.  And thank goodness!  I would be a sloppy, crying lost cause if I didn't have those people who stepped up this last week and recognized that I was going completely bat shit crazy while mourning and invited me over for dinner or took me out to dinner or sent me a non-dying sympathy plant or wore a pair of shoes to a concert I was hoping to be at, but got booked for a funeral instead.  Life happened, I cried my guts out, but I was damn grateful that it happened because it made me realize that I am one lucky woman to have the legacy that I do from the man we sent to heaven. 

One last note about the outfit....I mentioned above that the mint pants are actually capris.  Here's the story on those.  I have wanted colored pants for a long time, but I've always felt like they look RIDICULOUS with my curves.  And then they generally call them skinny jeans and I'm like, peace out kids....I saw these at Macy*s and I snatched them up a few years ago.  I LOVE them.  And I especially love wearing them in the winter with boots because I am the ONLY one who knows there is a really goofy 6 inch gap between the end of the capri leg and the sock under said boot.  It's quite hilarious when I take the boots off and I usually have a good hearty laugh at how un-sexy I look and promptly take the socks off. 

The moral of the story:  Cut yourself some slack and embrace the imperfections, people!  That's what makes us interesting.  Who doesn't like a good story?  We all have 'em. 

Until next time, my lovelies!

-R

Once In His Life.

Lucille Ball has been quoted as saying, "once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead."  In the wake of that one holiday this week, I decided to debut the winter hair pictures from my photo shoot with Kel-Z Photography and talk about the reality of loving a redhead.

Before I wax eloquent I have to fill you in on the hilarity that goes on to make these pictures just right.  If you recall from my fall shoot, the hair picture was our VERY last photo and just kind of happened and was perfect.  I decided that I wanted the winter version to be a stark contrast piece because we would be in snow.  I found the scarf at Sears on a killer sale during the holidays and it was perfect because it had some pattern and sheen, but wasn't old lady or crazy (because that matters).  The other element I wanted was red lips.  It's only been in the last two years that I've been brave enough to sport red lipstick in public and rock it like a boss.  I credit it to a certain man who shall remain nameless.  This photo was the very last shot again because it included laying in snow and freezing for a good cause.  We laughed and laughed when we got up from taking the photo and my head print was in the snow as well as bum....so we took a photo.  You can really only see my head  print so we put in a little prop to show what you were looking at.

Ok, let's get down to falling in love with a redhead....this one in particular.....

A few years ago my family engaged in a Top Ten quirks email that was so dang funny.  To this day I wish I would have saved it because it was really obvious that my siblings found spouses that were very well suited for them.  It's been interesting to get to know my brother-in-law and see the reasons why he is SO GOOD for my sister.  His sense of humor and go-with-the-flow attitude are at the top of the list of things that we love so much about him and are common denominators that are very good for the women in our family.  We are a bunch of strong-willed hotheads at times and having a man by our side who is chill and funny is critical.

So what does this Lucy need in her Ricky?  Read on, my lovelies.....I'm spewing my weaknesses...or my endearing qualities...however you look at it. 

• I am fiercely passionate about causes, especially those that involve children.  I am a true oldest child and I take charge and get shit done, especially when it involves kids who can't help themselves. 
• For all my OCD tendencies in the workplace, I am that much blah at home.  That means...when I was a teller my money had to all face the same direction (still does if someone gives me cash), but if the laundry doesn't get folded for WEEKS I am not stressed about it. 
• I am a hippie at heart and want everyone to get along, but you cross me and you best put on your big boy britches and run for the hills.  I have a good solid bitch card and I know when to use it. 
• I cry every single stinking time I watch the movie Rudy.  My heart still jumps at the anticipation that he might not get to play in the last game of his senior year at Notre Dame and I melt when the team gives up their jerseys so he has a chance to play. 
• A sub-point to this story---I love the movie and story so much that when I was a kid it was my dream to attend Notre Dame.  My mother wasn't too keen on that because Mormon kids don't go to Notre Dame.  To which I said, then why do Catholic kids go to BYU?  I attended neither school and I still cry when they sing the fight song. 
• I am probably more of a feminist that I like to admit, but probably not.  It drives me CrAzY when people treat me like a stupid girl or expect me to not know something because I have a uterus buried in there somewhere.  However, I MELT and LOVE it when a man waits for me and holds the door open for me.  Mutual respect is the name of the game so I will treat you like a normal human being and you do the same.  xoxo
• I come from a geeky musical redneck patriotic mouthy (ok maybe just my sister and I fit this description) Mormon family.  If that bothers you then keep on looking for Barbie with a testimony because this girl ain't none of that.  I am who I am and I rather enjoy a lad who brings some depth to our family mix.  A lot actually. 
• Talk smack about my siblings or my nephews and I will unleash.  Period.  We are awesome people. 
• My relationship with God is one that has evolved into a deeply personal and very real deal.  I have experienced some tragic and trying times in my life and I know that the way I am living my life is how I need to be living it.  I know that for some there are some boxes on their list that I'm not checking, but I can honestly get on my knees at night and still commune with God and know that He is listening and that He cares.  Those conversations can get a little pointed and full of frustration, but I know He knows the inner depths of my heart and what I REALLY want in life. 
• I regularly lose sleep over how I will make ends meet and because of that I will NOT be a non-working housewife.  I just won't.  I can't do that to a man because I know firsthand the stress that it entails and if it means that I work 2 nights at the mall or have an at-home business, then I will do it.  I absolutely will NEVER be a financial burden.  That's just not how I roll. 

I could probably go on and on with the list, but I'll end.  Why play all my cards on my blog?  The point of all of this is, my hair doesn't define me, but it definitely plays a big part in who I am.  They've done lots of studies on the genetics of redheads and it's proven that we have a higher tolerance to pain (holding off on child birth to prove that) and loose ligaments (just ask my chiropractor) and I don't know a redhead who isn't feisty as hell at times.  BUT!  We are human just like the rest of ya and to that lucky man who will eventually win my heart and convince me to share a life with him I say, "you get one chance to fall madly in love with a redhead....make it count."  

The moral of the story:  redheads are human.  (Gasp)

Until next time, my lovelies!

-R